Welcome. Welcome. Welcome to another. Episode. Not that I think about it. I think I should probably prep. The intro and the outro. For the new. Season. And attach it to these winners episodes. I dunno. I'll, I'll do some usage and think about it. So whatever intro you hear, well, that's a decision I came to you, but let's jump right into this episode that I want it to be too long, but just wanted to speak about that speaking engagements that I mentioned very briefly towards the end of the last episode. So coming off the last bonus episode. I hope that you had a good Christmas. I trust and I hope that as of when this episode comes out, that I would have had the time of my life with friends and family. We've got a pack. Agenda for my trip and I'm super excited. If you stay behind in the states or the Western world. What that is snowed or not. I hope that you had a good, good, good, good white Christmas. I hope that life cheated you. I hope you were able to take some time off. And for those of, uh, families who are in health care, I mean, what a sacrifice it is to constantly have to work around the clock. And so thank you so much for your sacrifice. My mama is one of them, so I definitely salute, or these people. Let's jump into the episode. Eh, I don't even know if I'm going to be putting this out on new year's day or not. It was see, I think I probably should. I should probably release. That episode. Like on Christmas day and then when it leaves us one on new year's and then, I guess we'll see what happens. I just don't know though, if I should make this bonus episode, like the first episode in season two, Hm. I don't know. Oh, whatever you end up seeing as whatever I decide. Okay. So let's, let's talk. Those are one of those episodes. It has no structure. It's just, you know, me. I mean, I don't think I ever have any shark share, but you get the point. Let's just jump right into it. So. I had the speaking engagements this Monday. I mean, over the years, I think since 2020 to now I have had many speaking engagements. Um, and when I say speaking engagements, I mean like, you know, Christian perspective, speaking engagements over the years, even way before then, I've had a lot of. Academic speaking engagements where professors have called on me to come in, you know, speak and things like that. But I'm talking more from a place of ministry wise. And so in 2020, I began to have a bit of that, but most of it was really on grounds that I was being trained on. Right. I have this. Um, I have this ministry with my friends how's of encounters. It's actually one of the reasons why I'm currently in Ghana. we're doing. And often each donation and just a few things like that. And so we have a ministry it's really just one that is centered on bringing people to know who Christ is in summary and just, you know, encouraging people to come into a place where. They become more like Christ even as we are souls also journey to becoming more like Christ. So on this, on this platform and online, the teams immediate pray at channels. And you know that the sessions that we've had, I've had the opportunity to lead. Many times I've had opportunity to speak. Many times But this is all been on grounds that I was being trained on. I was being prepped for, it was this other platform that my friends and I also joined that, you know, I got a lot of exposure there. That's where, um, I started to shopping a bit of the prophetic. And, you know, things like that. So, so I've had, I've had, I've had speaking engagements as the points musically, but this was the first one where it was not particularly on grounds that I had availed myself to be trained on. I'm just a member of this platform. I attend the services when I can and all that. So nothing really huge. Um, you know, I don't even think everyone apart from don't even know me. I like that. They probably just knew me. Uh, someone who just joins debris. Okay. You know, nothing, nothing huge. so they're the pioneer of those platform and if you're listening, hi, thank you so much for the opportunity for the other. I really do not take it for granted. God bless you so so much. But yeah. Back to the episode. So. The pioneer of that platform. He happened to chance upon this podcast. And I haven't shared the podcast with him because. Season one of this podcast was really me just trying to hide myself, build, practice, and develop and, you know, just be sure that, okay, this is something that God has actually called me to do. Right. And so season two is really going to be where I begin to actually step fully into this. Um, speaking ministry that God has been leading me to. So, how did it really share this podcast with a lot of people It was really low key, very, very low key. But he happened to come across it and, you know, he took her lesson even before he took his lesson. I believe he said he felt led to invite me to the program, but you know, it wasn't really quite sure because again, like I don't really come across as that passing on that platform, you know, sometimes. When you are at the forefront of a lot of things you does want to please where you can just hide yourself and just also drink from that. Well, sometimes you don't want to always just keep pouring, pouring, pouring into people. It's very necessary for people to also point into you. And so. he took a lesson. He scheduled me for the program on his leg. You want to do it? Are the ones that episode to be too long. So I'm just going to keep it very brief, huge summary, but I didn't really want to do this day because I'm like, Ugh. Charlie MI I don't know. Like I told him, please. I told him that I can preach. Because, I mean, the way I joined and I see people break down the things and I'm like, I can't like the platform is called the prophetic platform. That's the ministry. I'm like, how can I count on to a place called the prophetic platform? Like, yes, I know I'm, you know, I'm cold. You know, in that, in that, um, Was it called? I know I have that. I have that. That calling them Monday. You know, and all that, but in like still prophetic platform. you come to toxic people. The rooms, you have to make sure, you know, you know what you're going to see. So I was really hesitant about it. I spoke to my prophetic mama. She was like, huh? You know, just go ahead, do it. And then this is how he looked at me and he was like, oh, if you can't read you, can't just lead prayers and give a short equitation. I said, Prius, I kind of lead Prius. At least three years, almost every week, you know? on my friends and I are, uh, ministry. Page I lead prayers. And what have you. I was very happy. I was very gendered, but you know, the theme was gratitude. And the joke was on me that. Once I sat down to start to prepare prayer points and all that. I just went blank. It was a Saturday. The word, it was like eight. God, since you've got whatever you going to pray for really? Cause. I started to feel like the magnitude and the totality of everything that we can pray with. A theme. Gratitude is thank you, Jesus. I mean. That is all that. We can really say when all of a sudden that yes, you can see all the, thank you. Thank you for the house. Thank you for the car. Thank you for the baby. Thank you for the match. Thank you for the good life. Thank you for the mansion. Thank you for my ministry. Thank you for this. Thank you for my friends. Thank you for long life. Thank you for health. Like at the end of the day, it all centers on the fact that we really just want to say, thank you, Lord. Thank you, Jesus. Thank you. My God. You know, So I went on a very windy, long road to prepare for this engagement. And I'm not going to bore you with all the details of that. I do have the session recorded. Um, I don't know. I'll speak to him backstage, maybe one day. If the Lord leads. Um, I would upload it to the podcast. It was like an hour and change episode. Probably not going to be edited to probably be a little background noise and all that, but we'll see, we'll see how the Lord leads, but the Lord had me record. That that session. I don't know why, but I guess maybe because first, you know, First major speaking engagements anyways. So I went on there and I began to speak in, let me tell you I was so anxious going. On to the call and I don't even know why, but I really just prayed. The whole time leading up to all just telling God I got. If you told this man to bring me here and now he's brought me here. If he does speak to It should be, you know, that it's you, that I'll be disgracing because me, when all is said and done. It's you that I arrived on this, your wings that I write on. And so that ear is like, you've, you've got to help me through this thing, you know? So I was really just talking to HS. And if you knew here, HS is what I call the holy spirit. Um, the holy spirit, we have a very interesting, very, very dynamic. Relationship that sometimes people think is very weird, but you know, It works for us. You know, when you hear people say like, this is what works in our marriage, like, honestly, this is what works for ages. And I like, we. We be vibing. Okay. We've been vibing a lot, a lot, a lot. You know, he makes me laugh a lot. We are really just getting into this season of intimacy with him where. I'm just so I'm just so in tune with him sometimes though. I can just dead. Just swelling and like things like, oh, I'm just, I'm just doing this, this prior saying those amazing passing, but. Let me know, let me don't even go into all that. Like it just squeaks, but let me know. Go. Oh there, because as I go in her room, And we'll just be going, going, going. But, I'm determined in this new year to keep my episodes to 20 minutes maximum. So that's what we go and do. so I went on. The Lord began to teach me, honestly, half of the things that I was saying on that call God was teaching me those things in that moment. And you know, that's one thing I've come to realize a goal. The first two episodes of this podcast, I try to script them. The first one was crypt head, even at a point. I mean, I went. Off script and all of that. But when you go back and listen to those episodes, Baron, the fact that that's, of course they were my first few, you know, ticks on. And so I was nevers and all those other things, it really did not sound very natural. It wasn't really coming out of me. And there's one word that this, this man of God who invited me to this podcast said, When the feedback he gave me up to he's like, it just sounded like you were just flowing. Like it was really just coming out of your belly. And that is something that I really pray to God for. Like, I don't want to go and stand in front of people and just give people a bunch of scripture that. I cannot add examples too. I want to make sure that whatever I'm speaking to people that, that, that they catch life. Right so that they catch life. Because if after I have spoken to a group. Nothing has really entered them. Then I have failed. I have filled that mission until. One thing. I've realized that the Lord has been teaching you with this podcast is. Just teaching me like, Hey, every day that we journey together every day that we have conversations together every day that you read the word every day that you spend listen to the same ones every minute that you spent, you know, um, watching your mentors from a far and near. Every moments that you do things that equip you to become a better Christian. You're already preparing for these speaking engagements. You already preparing for the podcast episodes. And so while the planner in me wants to have everything organized, wants to have everything skips it, like I want to go into it, knowing that Charlie, I know exactly what I'm coming to see because I can't come in this grace, God, I can't come in disgrace myself. So I just want to have everything planned out. But God has really been teaching me through this podcast first. And then he confirmed his word to me through the speaking engagements that, Hey, maybe go. I journey with you every day we do this life thing together. We just, all the time. So that was the same way that when you take the mic, I take over, when you take the mic, I can still speak through you. so I started doing, I believe it was maybe like episode three or four of the podcast that I started going, I would come. And I would say that, Hey, I don't even know what I'm coming to see, but let's see what happens. I would come with. No plan, no outline. No, no nothing. I just come and sit down like, okay. Holy spirit. Over to you. Let's just talk, let me just give up these about my life, like ask and let's see what people pick from it. And I'm always amazed when people come to me and the Alexis, this episode blessed me, you know, like I've been going through this and I'm like, wow. This is what I prayed for. And I'm really beginning to see God an answer. Sometimes you may not hear me. Quote scripture. You may not hear me. Quotes, you know, setting a and that in second Kings, I was in connecting scripture and OWC. My, my goal is to come to a place where the scripture is. It's in me. It's it just comes out. Sometimes you hear me say certain things on the Bible, but I probably don't even know exactly where they, I probably know that, okay. This thing is in provost about I'll have to go and locate up and, you know, find exactly where it is, but I've just comes up when I want. The scriptures to just be a part of me. I want it to be my life's. I want it to be something that I referenced daily when I'm going to hot seasons, whatever it is like, it's just coming to me. The holy spirit is just bringing things to my remembrance. So I started the speaking engagement I started and I mean, if you know me know that's me, I'm always joking and playing around. I don't know if it comes across a lot on this podcast, but you're probably going to be seeing that in the next. Um, seizing because I'm really delving into like, okay, let me just stop being extra guarded all the time and just be authentically me. Just, just, just put the personal self other the. The thing that God wants me to do, let me just let go. And just let him do that thing to me. And I really thank God because this season has really thoughts me that Hey. if I did not need God. If I could just plan out everything and come in and speak. Then I'm really not relying on God, you know? And so Glen has really been teaching me to just trust him. Because just think about a. How do you go into a meeting that you've had like two weeks to prepare for and you don't really know where you're going to see God just trusted God, like a God. Got if you don't give me wait. Got it. And that would be disagrees over here. Like, and I realized I got, kind of gives me images. He kind of shows me images. Kind of lets me watch my soul speaking and like I can just be sitting there and I'm just downloading from Zen, like, okay. I don't know fully yet what I'm going to see, but I'll use God as generous. And that, that, that I leave. He satisfies a bit of the planet. Me. Where he would just show me pictures and like, see, let me see my, so speaking certain parts of whatever I am going to see. So for this episode, I saw myself speaking certain parts of it before it even began. Like I know kind of where God is with to take the episode too. Sometimes I don't really know where it's going to end, but he kind of gives me where we're going to start. He's like, okay. Jessica and Sudan, let's record talk about this, this and that. And sometimes I start talking about one thing and that's the one thing that is goes to the rest of the episode, you know? And then he's like, okay, we'll do this one on the next one. And sometimes he just tells me, just put this one on snap. This one doesn't have to come support us. So I'm really in that season of just really learning to pick his way as learning to let go and let him recognizing that. The words are truly not supposed to be coming from me. They're supposed to be coming from him to you. I am just the vessel. And so if I want to have everything planned out, Then am I really going to see what he wants me to see? Or am I going to see what I feel like or what I felt like in that moment when I was planning, what he wanted me to say. That was a thousand miles foods. I hope it made sense, but I see that we are almost at the 20 minute mark. So let's just jump into the points about gratitude. So I have just finished recording the. Second bonus episode. But I think looking at it, it's about 33 minutes long. So I think I'm going to split it into two. Just to make it three winners episodes. The first one. It's going to be, what did I even talk about on that one? I think that was like the Christmas Juan. Yeah, I literally don't remember what I, what I said on that one. And it's rarely on our, since I started recording that, but I think I'm going to split this into two. So if you're hearing me. Speak right now. I think I would upload both at the same time, but just, just keep things pretty, pretty short, pretty sweet. Um, Um, to make it a bit digestible. I think I'm going to split it and then jump into the bit about gratitude and the third bonus episode. And say, yeah, if this was like an abrupt answer, I'm not sure if I was supposed to put this at the beginning. I think I put at the end. So anyways, if you're hearing this then jump onto the next bonus episode, because I think I really went deep in there about gratitude and all that. I just don't think it just feels right to merge the two different topics together. So it would be a continuation. Add your own pace and yeah.